7 Little Things That Can Lead to a Divorce
There are many things that can lead to divorce. Some of the most common reasons for couples ending their marriages are adultery, abuse, and financial disputes. These are some of the bigger reasons why couples get divorced. But are there smaller little things that can cause an end to your marriage? Maybe you have heard about couples getting divorced because they can’t stand how their spouse doesn’t replace the toothpaste cap back on the tube, or they could be lazy. Perhaps if you can identify these smaller issues, you might be able to save your marriage. Here is a list of 7 little things that can lead to a divorce.
Lack of meaningful communication
Sometimes when you are married for a while, your communication skills begin to dwindle. You might get into a rut when it comes to talking. Your conversations could become mundane. You might stop talking about your feelings and deeper things. This can lead to emotional distance between couples. Couples also might stop talking about how they feel about certain issues. This can lead to resentment. Some might even be passive-aggressive. Communication is the lifeblood of a marriage. It’s extremely important to say how you feel. There might be certain things that worry you about your spouse. For example how they spend the family money, or if they are working too much and not spending enough time with the family and so on. Open and honest chats will help couples to feel closer to one another. If your spouse does open up, then listen to what they are saying. Don’t react angrily. Sometimes these small conversations can be uncomfortable, but it can help to build trust in one another.
Boredom
As the years go by, and marriage settles into an easy ebb and flow, life can become boring. You might have a good marriage, but you could miss the excitement of what life was like once before. Day after day could just become about working and taking care of kids. This could lead couples to feel exhausted at the end of the day, where all they do is watch movies and go to bed. The fun, excitement and “lust” drowns in the mediocrity of life. This can cause couples to look for fun and excitement somewhere else. If boredom becomes an issue, tell your spouse how you feel. Do fun things together. Hire a babysitter for the day and do something that you used to do when you were dating. Take up cooking or dancing classes together. If you would like something more exciting, try whitewater rafting together. Anything out of the ordinary can bring some fun back into your marriage. Here you can read how household chores can lead to divorce.
Making your kids your priority in your marriage instead of your spouse.
Yes, being an amazing parent is incredibly important. But what happens when your kids leave home? If you don’t prioritize your partner, you can become distant. Children need to know that their parents’ marriage is secure. Parents need to work together. By showing their kids what a happy normal marriage should be like it will help them make wise choices later in life when it comes to choosing a partner. Always make time for one another if there are children. Prioritizing each other will help your marriage to grow. Many couples get divorced once the kids leave home. Often times this is because they didn’t work on their marriage during these years. For more information on how to prioritize your spouse over your marriage have a look at this article.
You lose your sense of self
Have you ever seen the movie Crazy Stupid Love? This is a classic example of a spouse forgetting who they are. When it comes to marriage, it is so important to keep a sense of identity. Your spouse married you for who YOU are. Some people get married and then change to suit their spouse, forgetting who they are. They might stop doing things that they once loved, or just fit into their spouse’s schedule. Don’t lose who you are in a marriage. If you do this, your spouse might lose interest in you, because in a sense they have lost who they fell in love with.
People give up too easily.
People give up way too easily on their marriages. They see an issue and want to run. Instead of doing the work and trying to solve the problems in the marriage, they opt for divorce. If you can, fight for your marriage. See a marital counselor, have the hard conversations and stick it out. This will make your marriage stronger. Nothing in this world is perfect, and the chances are that, if you had to be with someone else, they would also have their issues.
Pornography
Many couples think that it’s okay to view porn together. But some people become addicted to pornography. This can cause intimacy problems in a marriage. Some people might prefer to watch porn instead of having sex with their spouse. A new study has brought out that couples are more likely to get a divorce once they starting viewing pornography together. Pornography can cause wives to feel inadequate and sometimes husbands could struggle to become aroused without viewing pornography.
Unresolved trauma
This is a biggie. There are so many people who bring major baggage and pain into their marriages. If someone suffered from a specific trauma in the past, it could affect their marriages. It’s important to seek out the help of a therapist to help you deal with the trauma that you faced. By letting go of painful baggage you can move forward and have a happy marriage, without the nightmares of your past coming back to haunt you.
These are a few small things that can cause problems in a marriage and eventually lead to divorce. It’s a good idea to try and identify these issues because, by identifying these small problems, you will be able to save and have a happy marriage.
